Start with a neutral observation and an open question:

“I've noticed you've been quieter in our recent project discussions. How have things been going for you?”

Or with an experienced employee: “You've become very confident in this role. Is the work still giving you enough opportunity to learn and grow?”

Listen before suggesting solutions. Ask “What do you think is behind that?” and “What would you like to change?”

Avoid: “You're not motivated anymore.” Describe what you see and invite their perspective.

What it means: People have meaningful influence over their work and how they achieve results, within clear goals and boundaries. Autonomy doesn't mean working without direction or accountability.

Explore: “Where do you feel you need approval for something you could handle yourself?” or “What would you like to take more ownership of?”

Ways to increase autonomy:

• Agree on the result and boundaries, then let the employee choose how to get there.
• Delegate a recurring decision rather than only another task.
• Invite the employee to propose improvements or lead an initiative they care about.
• Ask what check-in frequency would be useful instead of monitoring every step.

Example: An employee waits for approval on every routine customer exception. Together, you define which exceptions they can resolve independently and when to escalate. You review the arrangement after two weeks.

Try this week: Ask the employee to identify one decision they are ready to own. Agree on the limits and give them room to act.

Avoid: Saying “Take ownership” while continuing to control every step, or handing over responsibility without authority.

What it means: People feel respected, included, connected and able to make a meaningful contribution. Belonging is about relationships and being valued, not simply attending social events.

Explore: “Do you feel your perspective is heard?” or “What would help you feel more connected and involved?”

Ways to increase belonging:

• Make space for their ideas in decisions that affect their work, and explain what happens to their input.
• Recognize specific contributions, including work that is less visible.
• Help them build relationships across the team, such as through a shared project, peer learning or mentoring.
• Address exclusion, unresolved tensions or dismissive behavior directly.
• Ask how they prefer to connect; not everyone enjoys the same social activities.

Example: A remote colleague rarely contributes in meetings. You ask privately about their experience. They explain that discussions move on before they can speak. You share questions in advance and make space for everyone to contribute without singling them out.

Try this week: Ask one person whose perspective you rarely hear what would make participation easier. Act on the answer and follow up.

Avoid: Assuming a team lunch will repair a lack of respect, trust or inclusion.

What it means: People feel effective in their work, see progress and have opportunities to develop. Motivation can suffer when someone feels unable to succeed or when a capable employee no longer feels challenged.

Explore: “Do you feel challenged and able to grow in your work?”

Two situations to recognize:

• Building competence: Someone is learning or lacks confidence. Clarify what success looks like, provide manageable practice, coaching, feedback and time to improve.
• Growing competence: Someone already performs well but wants to learn something new. Explore deeper expertise, new projects, a course, mentoring others or responsibility for an improvement initiative.

Questions to discover their interests:

• “Which part of your work gives you energy, and which part has become repetitive?”
• “What would you like to learn or become better at?”
• “Is there a project, responsibility or problem you'd like to take on?”
• “Would you prefer to deepen your expertise, try something new or help others learn?”

Ways to increase competence:

• Let someone practise a challenging skill with support and useful feedback.
• Offer a relevant course, workshop, job shadowing or peer learning opportunity.
• Give an interested employee ownership of a small improvement project or new responsibility.
• Invite an experienced employee to mentor or teach others, if they find that meaningful.
• Make time for learning and recognize progress, not only final results.

Example · Building competence: A newly promoted employee avoids customer presentations. You arrange a short rehearsal, give specific feedback and let them lead the opening of the next presentation.

Example · Growing competence: An experienced planner delivers reliable results but finds the work repetitive. During a 1:1, they express an interest in automation. Together you agree on a small improvement project, time to learn Power BI and a follow-up in four weeks.

Try this week: Ask “What would you like to learn or take on next?” Agree on one opportunity the employee genuinely wants, with the time and support to make it realistic.

Avoid: Assuming everyone wants a promotion or extra responsibilities. Growth may mean mastering a craft, not climbing a ladder. Don't disguise additional workload as development.

Leader (CUE · Unblock): “I've noticed you've been bringing fewer ideas to our planning meetings. How are things going?”

Employee: “Every decision seems to get changed afterwards, so I wait for instructions now.”

Leader (ABC · Autonomy): “That sounds frustrating. Which decisions would you feel comfortable making yourself?”

Employee: “I could handle smaller customer exceptions without asking every time.”

Leader (CUE · Empower): “Let's define which exceptions you can decide on and review how it goes in two weeks.”

What changed? Instead of demanding more initiative, the leader listened and increased meaningful decision-making authority.

Leader: “You're doing well in this role. How are you feeling about the work itself?”

Employee: “I know the routine now. I'd like to learn something new.”

Leader (ABC · Competence): “What would you like to learn or take on next?”

Employee: “I'd love to improve our reporting process.”

Leader: “Would you like to propose a small pilot? Let's make room for it and decide what support you'd need.”

What changed? The leader didn't prescribe a promotion or another task. They helped the employee shape a meaningful learning opportunity.

• CUE: Structure the recurring 1:1 — Clarify, Unblock, Empower.
• ABC: Explore and strengthen motivation — Autonomy, Belonging, Competence.
• GROOW: Coach someone towards their own solution — Goal, Reality, Obstacles, Options, Way Forward.
• I-BUILD: Give constructive feedback when specific behavior or performance needs attention.

Use the tool that fits the moment. ABC doesn't replace clear expectations or timely feedback, and you don't need all four frameworks in every conversation.

• Increase Autonomy: Transfer ownership of one decision or let the employee choose how to deliver an agreed outcome.
• Increase Belonging: Make their contribution more visible, invite them into a relevant discussion or help build a useful working relationship.
• Increase Competence: Agree on a skill to practise or a new challenge, course, improvement project or responsibility they want to explore.

Ask: “Which of these changes would make the biggest difference to you?” Agree on what will change, who will do what, and when you'll review it.

Employee's interest: Learn how to automate recurring reports.

Opportunity: Lead a small pilot to improve one monthly report.

Leader's support: Make time for learning, connect them with a colleague and clarify the scope.

Follow-up: Review what they learned, what worked and what they'd like to do next in four weeks.

Keep the agreement small enough to fit alongside normal responsibilities.